Magic Bullet Recipe Attempt 1: Guacamole

So today is my birthday (I think I’m officially in my upper 20s now), and one of my favorite gifts has been the Magic Bullet. It’s this mini mixer/blender that comes with two different blade styles (based on what you are mixing/blending) and several different cup attachments (a couple just for the mixing/blending and several for mixing/blending/serving). Anyway. It also came with a recipe book that had all these delicious-sounding recipes. One of which was magicbulletguacamole. I’ve always wanted to make guacamole, but assumed it was really difficult (I realize that it probably would have taken me about five minutes of internet surfing to find out that it, in fact, is not difficult to make, but whatever). Because I’ve been off the domestication wagon all summer, I thought now was as good a time as any to hop back on. So yesterday I visited my local Super Walmart (and Super Target, because the onions at Walmart seemed ridiculously huge and I knew for a fact that Target’s were smaller) and loaded up my cart with all the ingredients from the recipe.

My first mistake was that I didn’t take the time before leaving my internet-ready condo to find out what a “boiler” onion was, or what it meant when the recipe said, “or just a regular onion.” I know from experience that Chipotle’s guac has red onions in it, so I decided that’s what “regular” meant. I also didn’t know what a “large avocado” meant (larger than my fist? My head? My purse?) or how to pick a quality avocado. I also didn’t know what a “clove” of garlic was. The recipe called for two or three cloves, and at first I thought I needed to purchase three of the little guys you find in the garlic bin, but I couldn’t imagine anything needing that much garlic, so I only bought one. Thank the food prep gods.

After wandering around the produce section for about 10 minutes looking for cilantro, I finally found it. I also needed lemon or lime juice (I went with lemon because I didn’t see lime) and a tomato. Now I was ready to Magic Bullet-ize my purchases.

Not quite. Since I didn’t know what a clove of garlic was, I looked that up online. Turns out it’s just these little things (about the size of my thumb from the knuckle up, approximately) inside all the “wrapping paper.” So that took me about 15 minutes to unwrap. Then I cut up my tomato and onion to the proper specifications. I then sliced through my avocado, got rid of the pit, then tried to scoop out the “meat.” I’m really unfamiliar with avocados, so I wasn’t entirely sure how much of it I was supposed to use or how close to the peel/skin to get. Anyway. I threw all my ingredients into the small mixer, slapped on the cross blade and was ready to “pulse” (a Magic Bullet term for a mixing technique).

The directions said I would pulse about three to five times, but I’d say that I pulsed closer to 20. It seemed like only portions of the contents were mixing and chopping. Anyway, I eventually got it all to a consistent guacamole paste and was ready to taste my creation.

My advice: never use the recommended amount of red onions. Use much, much less. Those red onions left my mouth on fire. I’m glad I didn’t splurge for jalepenos in this version. Yikes. Seriously, I was tearing up. I would also recommend no more than two cloves of garlic. My mouth still tastes like garlic, and I made it last night. I’ve brushed my teeth three times, used mouthwash twice, had three sticks of gum and multiple pieces of Pizza Hut pizza (not sure how that really applies, but I just wanted to let everyone know I had it). I’m concerned the garlic will never go away. I guess I won’t have to worry about vampires at least.

I’d also recommend making sure your avocado is fully ripe. I think mine must not have been…my guac is much more yellow than it is green. I read online (after I made it) that most store avocados are not yet ripe, so if you buy one, you should let it sit on your counter for two or three days before using it.

I found the recipe for Chipotle guac online today, so I’m hoping to re-create that in the next month or so. This has nothing to do with the Magic Bullet, more along the lines of stealing recipes: I’d also like to try to re-create the Pasta E Fagoli from Olive Garden. Yum!

Anyway, that was my first Magic Bullet experience. I meant to make a smoothie or other fruit-related drink today, but I never got around to it. I think my next major Magic Bullet recipe to try will be the Pesto pasta sauce. I’ll let you know how it goes.


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